THEOSOPHY

AARDVARK

 

No Aardvarks were harmed in

the preparation of this Website

 

 

Mrs Trellis of North Wales

 

Iím Sorry IHavenít a Clue

The Antidote to Panel Games

 

Return to Homepage

 

 

Who is Mrs Trellis of North Wales?

 

 

Mrs Trellis of North Wales is the weird eccentric lady who writes every week toHumphrey Lyttelton, the Chairman of Radio 4ís comedy panel game ďIím sorry, I havenít a clueĒ.

 

This is a very popular programme with Theosophists. The show is introduced as "The Antidote to Panel Games" and consists of a panel of four comedians, split into two teams and "given silly things to do" by a chairman. The programme was first aired on April 11th 1972 and the signature tune is a cabaret version of Deutschland Uber Alles called "The Schickel Shamble" written by Ron Goodwin.

 

You can catch this show and Mrs Trellis of North Wales regularly on BBC Radio 4 and the World Service. Some old episodes are run on BBC 7 (Digital Radio). The show tours the country and you may be able to get in as part of the studio audience.

 

Iím Sorry I Havenít a Clue Comes to Cardiff

21st December 1998 and begins with the customary

letter from Mrs Trellis of North Wales

 

Mrs Trellisís Letters

 

Mrs Trellisís incoherent letters usually involve her mistaking Humphrey Lyttelton for another Radio 4 presenter or media personality, and are read out to much amusement. A modest web page, such as this, cannot even begin to convey just how funny these letters actually are when Humphrey Lyttelton reads them out but here are two examples anyway;

 

Dear Kenton,


I was appalled on tuning in this morning to hear a torrent of blatant filth, with terms such as 'Big Bang', 'Large Firm Success', 'Satisfying Performance', and worst of all, 'Job Blows'. It was the most disgusting edition of the Today programme's Business Report ever!

Yours faithfully,

 

Mrs. Trellis

 

_______________________

 

Dear Mr Manilow,

I have so much been enjoying your cookery show. I have to say it's been years since I last came upon a spotted dick. Your bread-making recipes have been particularly helpful during the BBQ season - I have been getting my baps out at every opportunity.

Yours et cetera,
Mrs Trellis.

PS: love to everyone at BBC Devon.

 

There are more examples at

Mrs. Trellis@Everything2.com

 

Does Mrs Trellis of North Wales actually exist?

 

Opinion amongst Theosophists is divided but the majority have concluded that she must be a real person. After all, who else is writing all these ridiculous letters? She also has her own website http://www.mrs-trellis.co.uk/ and anything on the internet must be true.

 

If Mrs Trellis of North Wales really exists, then this begs another question, does she realize the enormous laughs prompted by her letters? Is She doing it deliberately? Does she even listen to the programme? Does she have a radio?

 

Mrs Trellisís first name is Ivy and it has been suggested that she may be a member of an extremist gardening group who worship Percy Thrower (an Ascended Master of Gardening) as a Deity.

 

An alternative theory is that Mrs Trellis of North Wales is actually a panel of experts on Nuclear Fission, who are communicating their ideas with similar experts worldwide by means of coded messages hidden in Mrs Trellisís letters. This is similar to way in which coded messages about the Stock Market are concealed in the Shipping Forecast or the Eurovision Song Contest gives signals to start revolutions.

 

A yet more avant-garde theory suggests that Humphrey Lyttelton writes the letters himself. No, that canít be right.

 

___________________________

 

 

Hereís another essential website for fans of the Mrs Trellis of North Wales phenomenon;

 

British In America: MRS TRELLIS of North Wales

Here's a nice site, devoted to the mysterious and

barking-mad Mrs Trellis of North Wales who

does nothing but write strange letters

and emails to Humphrey

http://british-in-america.blogspot.com/2005/12/mrs-trellis-of-north-wales-play.html

 

 

This webpage links Mrs Trellis of North Wales to a Welsh version of the Mornington Crescent game played on Iím Sorry I Havenít a Clue

 

Mrs Ivy Trellis

Mornington Crescent Reverse Welsh Rules Only Please

 

_______________________

 

 

Here below is the entry in the Encyclopaedia Morningtonia for Mrs Trellis of North Wales which reports that she is a legendary player of the Mornington Crescent game. The entry covers her achievements in playing Mornington Crescent and her contribution to the development of the game

 

Encyclopaedia Morningtonia: Trellis, Mrs.Trellis

 

 

Mrs. Trellis is a dear, frail, somewhat doddery old woman from North Wales who writes incessantly to Sir Humphrey Lyttleton on the I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue programme. It would surprise anyone who does not know the history of the game to realise that she has also been perhaps the greatest MC player in history - the only other players of whom this could be said are Cripplehead and Hugo: she never met Hugo in competition, and Cripplehead only once, in an exhibition match - which she lost by a very narrow margin. Given Cripplehead's dislike of tournament play, it is possible to speculate that the result might have been different had they met in a championship match.

 

Since her victory in the first post-WWII championship, she has won the World Championship a record 17 times (most recently in 1984), on twelve occasions winning a complete Grand Slam of the Singles, Pairs, Team and All-In titles. She has also won countless other international and national championships: all this despite the fact that, every so often, she would take a year or two away from competition play, to take up a role in administration of the game.

 

Until recently, she has made comebacks to competitive play every time: but her most recent retirement seems to be permanent. She is now highly active in the IMCS, and is believed to have largely co-written the legendary Chalk Farm '84 rules - the only known ruleset (until Holland Park 2000) to have been accepted by both CAMREC and the IMCS. Chalk Farm '84 was published shortly after her last championship win.

 

She remains a great proponent of Mornington Crescent, and is said by most to be one of the forces behind modern play. She contributes to countless funds, schemes and rule revision committees to further the Mornington Crescent cause.

 

Also the inventor of countless manoeuvres and gambits, including the Trellis Power Shunt, the Trellis Quadrating Strile and the Trellis Neasden Pincer, she is still a formidable player in her own right, despite a blind spot in recent years regarding the cross-hatching of Theydon Bois.

 

The fact that she still officially holds the current ranking of #1 in the Grandmaster tables - despite her age and actual retirement from playing in ranking tournaments - is, to a certain extent, indicative of the awe in which most players hold her, at least on the field. Nobody else is likely to be accorded the honorific of the #1 ranking until

 

(a) they stand out far above the rest, and

 

(b) Mrs Trellis is long dead, or beaten in a one-on-one match Ö until then, #2 seems to be the limit that any modern Grandmaster can aim for.

 

Mrs Trellis has also made a profound contribution to the theory of Mornington Crescent, having even collaborated with Grossman on quantum token dynamics amongst other work. Truly, she is a titan of the Game.

 

Encyclopaedia Morningtonia

Essential reading for fans of Mornington Crescent. The big names and history and development of the game.

 

North Wales Chapter of the

Mornington Crescent Psychic Insomniacs

 

_____________________________

 

 

Here is the Mornington Crescent Theosophy Website

 

The Mornington Crescent

Underground Theosophy Website

The Earth Base for Evolutionary Theosophy

Worldwide, London & UK Theosophy Links.

London Directories & London Blog Links. London Bookshops

Info for Fans of BBC Radio 4ís Iím Sorry I Havenít a Clue

http://www.blavatskycalling.theosophywales.org.uk/morningtoncrescenthomepage.htm

 

 

 

If Mrs Trellis of North Wales actually exists,

Then a Mr Trellis (possibly of North Wales)

must also exist or have existed at some time

 

_______________________

 

 

Mrs Trellis of North Wales

and the Darth Vader Connection

 

 

 

Legends of the Anglesey Jedi

Darth Vader and Jedi Knights fight it out in North Wales

 

Awesome tales from the Anglesey Jedi Church

with plans to establish a colony on the Moon

and an attack on two Anglesey Jedi Knights

by a man posing as Darth Vader. Plus a reaction

by a not pleased Anglesey resident who doesnít

have a very high opinion of the Jedi Church.

 

It is almost impossible to believe that Mrs Trellis of North Wales doesnít have something to do with this. Is it just a coincidence that inter-galactic warfare has brought the most evil man in the universe to Anglesey or are more sinister forces at work.

 

 

Darth Vader is known to be a big fan of ďIím Sorry I havenít a ClueĒ and the early broadcasts from 1972 have penetrated the remoter parts of our Galaxy. Possibly Mrs Trellis of North Wales has used her letters to somehow alert Darth to the presence of Jedi Knights on Anglesey and offered to put him up while he continues the inter-galactic war.

 

 

Return to Homepage

_____________________

 

THEOSOPHY

AARDVARK

 

For more info on Theosophy

Try these

 

 

 

Daveís Streetwise Theosophy Boards

The Theosophy Website that

Welcomes Absolute Beginners

If you run a Theosophy Group,

Please feel free to use any of the

material on this Website

 

Theosophy

Cardiff

The Cardiff Theosophical Society Website

 

Theosophy

Wales

The National Wales Theosophy Website

 

Wales! Wales! Theosophy Wales

The All Wales Guide to

Getting Started in Theosophy

This is for everybody not just people in Wales

 

Theosophy Cardiffís Instant Guide to Theosophy

 

Cardiff Theosophy Start-Up

A Free Intro to Theosophy

 

Cardiff Theosophical Archive

 

Cardiff Blavatsky Archive

A Theosophy Study Resource

 

 

High Drama & Worldwide Confusion

as Theosophy Cardiff Separates from the

Welsh Regional Association (formed 1993)

 

 

Blavatsky Blogger

Independent Theosophy Blog

 

 

Quick Blasts of Theosophy

One Liners & Quick Explanations

 

 

Great Theosophists

The Big Names of Theosophy

 

 

The Most Basic Theosophy Website in the Universe

If you run a Theosophy Group you can use

this as an introductory handout

 

 

 

Theosophy

The New Rock Ďn Roll

 

 

The Key to Theosophy

Nothing answers questions like Theosophy Can

 

 

Theosophy

Nirvana

 

Hey Look!

Theosophy in Wales

 

The Voice of the Silence

 

The South of Heaven Guide to

Theosophy and Devachan

 

The South of Heaven Guide

To Theosophy and Dreams

 

The South of Heaven Guide

To Theosophy and Angels

 

 

Theosophy and Help From

The Universe

 

Theosophy Wales Centre

 

Feelgood

Theosophy

Visit the Feelgood Lodge

The main criteria for the inclusion of

links on this site is that they have some

relationship (however tenuous) to Theosophy

and are lightweight, amusing or entertaining.

Topics include Quantum Theory and Socks,

Dick Dastardly and Legendary Blues Singers.

 

Theosophy Avalon

The Theosophy Wales

King Arthur Pages

 

Death & How to Get Through It

Lentil burgers, a thousand press ups before breakfast and

the daily 25 mile run may put it off for a while but death

seems to get most of us in the end. We are pleased to

present for your consideration, a definitive work on the

subject by a Student of Katherine Tingley entitled

ďMan After DeathĒ

 

Pages About Wales

General pages about Wales, Welsh History

and The History of Theosophy in Wales

 

 

The Tooting Broadway

Underground Theosophy Website

The Spiritual Home of Urban Theosophy

 

The Mornington Crescent

Underground Theosophy Website

The Earth Base for Evolutionary Theosophy

 

Theosophy Birmingham

The Birmingham Annie Besant Lodge

 

The Theosophy Cardiff Guide

to Roath Park / Parc Y Rhath

 

Theosophy Tekels Park

Tekels Park, Camberley, Surrey, England GU15 -2LF

Article describing Tekels Park and its much

cherished wildlife by Theosophist and long

term Tekels Park Resident Madeleine Leslie Smith

 

 

 

 

Mrs Trellis of North Wales writes to Wolfie

in an attempt to take over in Tooting.

 

______________________

 

The Theosophy Cardiff

Glastonbury Pages

 

Chalice Well, Glastonbury.

The Theosophy Cardiff Guide to

Chalice Well, Glastonbury,

Somerset, England

 

The Theosophy Cardiff Guide to

Glastonbury Abbey

 

Theosophy Cardiffís

Glastonbury Abbey Chronology

 

The Theosophy Cardiff Guide to

Glastonbury Tor

 

The Labyrinth

The Terraced Maze of Glastonbury Tor

 

Glastonbury and Joseph of Arimathea

 

The Grave of King Arthur & Guinevere

At Glastonbury Abbey

 

Views of Glastonbury High Street

 

The Theosophy Cardiff Guide to

Glastonbury Bookshops

 

_____________________

 

Tekels Park

Camberley, Surrey, England GU15 - 2LF

 

Tekels Park to be Sold to a Developer

Concerns are raised about the fate of the wildlife as

The Spiritual Retreat, Tekels Park in Camberley,

Surrey, England is to be sold to a developer

 

Tekels Park is a 50 acre woodland park, purchased

for the Adyar Theosophical Society in England in 1929.

In addition to concern about the park, many are

worried about the future of the Tekels Park Deer

as they are not a protected species.

 

Many feel that the sale of a sanctuary

for wildlife to a developer can only mean

disaster for the parkís animals

 

Confusion as the Theoversity moves out of

Tekels Park to Southampton, Glastonbury &

Chorley in Lancashire while the leadership claim

that the Theosophical Society will carry on using

Tekels Park despite its sale to a developer

 

Theosophy talks of a compassionate attitude

to animals and the sale of the Tekels Park

sanctuary for wildlife to a developer has

dismayed many Theosophists

 

You donít need a Diploma in Finance and

even someone with a Diploma in Astral Travel

will know that this is a bad time economically

to sell Tekels Park

 

 

Future of Tekels Park Badgers in Doubt

Badgers have been resident

in Tekels Park for Centuries

 

Magnificent Tekels Park

 

St Francis Church

 

Concerns about Tekels Park Wildlife

 

Tekels Park for Sale

 

Party On! Tekels Park NOT!

 

The Tekels Park Minstrel

 

Tekels Park Badgers

Once Highly Valued by the

Theosophical Society in England

 

Theoversity Compromised by

Tekels Park Wildlife Issue

 

The Rejuvenation of

the Tekels Park Pond 1995

 

Hey Look!

Tekels Park is Being Sold to a Developer

 

 

Tekels Park & the Loch Ness Monster

A Satirical view of the sale of Tekels Park

in Camberley, Surrey to a developer

 

 

The Toffís Guide to the Sale of Tekels Park

What the men in top hats have to

say about the sale of Tekels Park

to a developer

 

_______________________

 

 

 

Classic Introductory Theosophy Text

A Text Book of Theosophy By C W Leadbeater

 

What Theosophy IsFrom the Absolute to Man

 

The Formation of a Solar SystemThe Evolution of Life

 

The Constitution of ManAfter DeathReincarnation

 

The Purpose of LifeThe Planetary Chains

 

The Result of Theosophical Study

 

 

Elementary Theosophy

An Outstanding Introduction to Theosophy

By a student of Katherine Tingley

 

Elementary TheosophyWho is the Man?Body and Soul†††

 

Body, Soul and SpiritReincarnationKarma

 

The Seven in Man and Nature

 

The Meaning of Death

 

 

Try these if you are looking for a

local Theosophy Group or Centre

 

 

UK Listing of Theosophical Groups

 

Worldwide Directory of Theosophical Links

 

International Directory of

Theosophical Societies

 

______________________

 

 

Theosophy Wales Group Start

The Theosophy Wales Guide to

Starting a Theosophy Group

& of course you donít need to live in Wales

to take advantage of this guide

 

 

 

 

 

Your Own Theosophy Group Starts Here

A Guide to starting your own Theosophy Group

 

These are suggestions and pointers for forming

your own independent Theosophy Group and

not instructions on how to form a branch of a

larger Theosophical Organisation.

 

The subject of affiliation to a larger body is

covered but as affiliation may mean compromise

and nobody owns Theosophy anyway, we leave

that decision entirely up to you

 

Mrs Trellis of North Wales

It is not beyond the realms of possibility that

Mrs Trellis of North Wales is reading this and

might decide to start a her own Theosophy Group

___________________

 

 

WALES

Pages about Wales

General pages about Wales, Welsh History

and The History of Theosophy in Wales

 

Wales is a Principality within the United Kingdom

and has an eastern border with England.

The land area is just over 8,000 square miles.

Snowdon in North Wales is the highest mountain at 3,650 feet.

The coastline is almost 750 miles long.

The population of Wales as at the

2001 census is 2,946,200.

 

Theosophy Wales 2008 Changes

A new structure for the

Theosophical Movement in Wales

 

 

Finding Stuff in Wales

North Wales is easier to find than Mrs Trellis

 

If you are thinking of participating in one of the many expeditions to look for

Mrs Trellis of North Wales, you may find these Wales links very useful.

You should be aware however, that despite many expeditions to North Wales

by experienced members of the Theosophy Movement and a satellite launched

from the Llanfairfechan Space Centre in 1983, Mrs Trellis has never been found

 

Please note also that Mrs Trellis of North Wales may no longer live in North Wales

but still keeps the title. Members of the House of Lords do this all the time.

 

 

National & Regional Wales Web Directories

 

National

 

Wales Index

 

Cilmeri

 

The Valley Connection

Web Directory For Wales

 

Open Directory (Wales UK)

Regional: Europe: United Kingdom: Wales

 

Wales Pages

Search Engine and Web Directory for Wales, UK

 

 

Welsh Regions

 

South Wales Index

 

North Wales Index

 

http://www.wales-biz.co.uk

North Wales Regional Directory

wales-biz.co.uk

The Hub, Off London Road

Denbighshire, North Wales, UK. LL21 Ė 0DD

 

West Wales Index

 

West Wales Web

Mid Wales Index

 

 

 

Google

 

Web Theosophy Aardvark

 

 

P.S.

 

Weíve just had a letter from

Mrs Trellis of North Wales

 

Dear Ozzie

 

Your websites have made Theosophy amusing, interesting and entertaining. Are you mad? Iíve always seen Theosophy as something for people who find Dutch verbs interesting.

 

Who can honestly say that they havenít stayed in bed til dinner time with a manual of Dutch verbs in one hand and a cup tea with the other, I know I have.

 

Kind Regards

 

Mrs Trellis

 

So there we are then, Mrs Trellis of North Wales must exist.